Thursday, January 30, 2014

My grandfather



To; Dearest grandfather,


I know that i wont be able to have a converstion with you again. Talking is like arguing to us. Always fighting with you to make you notice me. And i always know that you love me.
How are you doing over there? Did you eat? Is it very cold out there? Have enough clothing? Do you have a shelter at there? Where are you now?  And alot more...Million of question without any reply. How upset am i.

Sorry i promise not to cry again. But i couldnt. I convincing myself that everything will be okay. But its not okay. Im notlright. I couldnt take this blow. It happened too fast. Im not even mentally prepare for all this. Within one night and youre gone with the wind. Why didnt you wait for me? Im not even back from my flight yet. I didnt even see you for the last time. You haven even hug me or even tell me what you wish to say. i couldnt make it there .

This is the worst cny and the most disaster 2014. I fcuking hate this. Why does this happento me. Wtf is this. Why do i even have to face this . I cried my whole heart out but i didnt feel better. Im still very affected by it. I really miss you. I miss you alot.

If i can rewind. I wont go for this shitney flight.  And I won't even regret not staying back for you. I will definitely visit you every slot.  I know you hate hospital. I hate too. But I couldn't let you go. I just want you to be healthy and stay fit. Eat more and be more cheerful.  Talk to me. Scold me and tease me. I really need you as you're my strength of pillar.  Remember what i promised you.? To help you cut hair for cny., let you be more handsome then usual.  You break our promise. I haven't cut your hair yet. Why do you do this to me?

啊公我爱你。
Rest in peace
28.1.2014

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